Sea Witch

Your email has not found me because I am currently +/- 100ft under the ocean. I should resurface in the office on Tuesday, October 29.

October is the month of my people... and just to be clear I'm not technically a witch. (At least, not yet.) The only supernatural gift bestowed upon me by the bog witch I call "mother" is the ability to drink without getting a hangover. (Just kidding, I call her Laura.) Honestly, it's possible that being a witch is not hereditary and I'm just hella Irish.🍀

While it's unclear whether or not I'm part witch, one thing is for sure - I am 100% sarcasm. Conveniently, it’s National Sarcasm Month (no, really, look it up), and I’m celebrating by diving off a small boat into a big ocean during something meteorologists refer to as "Potential Tropical Cyclone Fifteen." Sounds friendly, right? Don’t worry, I’ve been assured that by the time I arrive, it’ll be nothing more than a tropical depression. Honestly, I probably won’t even notice once I jump in and begin my transformation into a sea witch.

In the mean time your email has successfully descended into my inbox and joined the others in the digital trenches. If you really need me, please tape a note to a sea turtle and toss it into the next hurricane and allow a few days for delivery.

If you need something before I ascend, please reach out to my land based colleagues. They're much less likely to be haunted by creatures of the deep:

Catch you later, land-dwellers!