Swimming with Sharks

I will be out of the office until Monday, November 9.

I am currently swimmin' with some big ole bull sharks. I don't know how I get permission to do things like this, but I'm told swimming with man-eaters is mainstream here in 2026. I'm less likely to get bit doing that than staying home with my bad cat Jeff who has a 100% chance of biting me. Take that sharks!

Don't worry, I already voted so there is no need for anyone to continue texting me about their candidacy to be the next undersecretary of vague responsibilities. I would like that to stop now. In fact, I'm swimming with sharks just to get a break from these texts!

Can you imagine? I get eaten by a shark, arrive at the river Styx, find a QR code, scan it, and then it's just some politician website. Infuriating!